When I think of my life, I think redeemed. Let me tell you why.

August 2019 I was staring at a stranger in the mirror. A broken, terrified woman who felt as if all her dreams had been ripped from her. I survived my deepest nightmare, my deepest held fear, terror and abuse. And I was just thankful to be living. I didn’t expect to have anything of what was stolen given back. I had my life and my freedom. If that was all I had I was determined that would forever be enough. I worked hard and fought to put myself back together and heal.

And then I met Nate.

He colored my world with laughter and love. _{^{(I could write a book about it, and did: my poetry collection Tapestry 🙂 )}.} Together, we stepped into a new story and began to build a new life.

And then two years later, we had our baby.

In 2019 I grieved over the loss of dreams I thought I would never see in my life.

Now I have both.

It has become stale and cliché, I think, to say “God is good and He gave this to me.” In the age of performative faith, it can feel inauthentic.

I think of it this way. Jesus was there, at the very bottom, in the pit I had found myself in. I prayed for a way out. He gave me one. I took it. Jesus was there as I crawled and fought my way out. When I thought I would drown in despair and the very physical pain of healing from trauma He was there telling me, “You are going to be okay.” I believed Him.

 It’s a blending of being given what I needed, and me making the choice to take action. Opportunity with obedience, if you will.

 I consider all good things in my life to be given by God. I do not think I deserve them, I have no sense of entitlement to blessings. And I suppose an argument could be made theologically to say that I don’t deserve them. But I got them anyway. In this age of entitlement, I think we need to remember that the King of the universe owes us nothing. Yet, he gave us a way to be made whole, a way to have hope, a way to have the brokenness, the ugliness, and the pain we experience in this fallen world either by our own choices or the choices of others (or both) turned upside down into redemption.

  And so, that’s why when I think of my life, I think redeemed:

Free from what distresses or harms: to free from captivity by payment of ransom : to extricate from or help to overcome something detrimental: to release from blame or debt : CLEAR : to free from the consequences of sin : to change for the better : 

REFORM, REPAIR

RESTORE.

            “Who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy.”

My life with Nate, and now with our baby are blessings from a gracious God who gives abundant life. I look at my child and my husband and think about the pit I found myself in four years ago and am filled with an overwhelming sense of gratitude.

Not everyone has physical evidence of redemption, but we all have the promise it and of hope if we follow Jesus. That in itself is far more than enough. I don’t want to stray into the realm of the health and wealth gospel. Hard things happen, and will, but that doesn’t change the fact that Jesus loves me. Or change that God is good and faithful. Those things are always true, regardless of what is happening around me or in my life.

And nothing will ever change the fact that when I found myself in a pit, he rescued me. He redeemed me.

I am redeemed.

That has been given to me and can never be taken away.

So let me say it, because it’s true—

God is good and He gave this to me.